white noise





     Take out my brain and throw me in a box with florescent lights. Chop off every creative thought I have branching out of my mind and constrain it; constrain it until it no longer exists. 
     I see a board, but instead of reading the content, I can only imagine what wonderful doodles could fill up all that open space. I want to paint color on these white walls, I want to play music through this silence. I want to put my heart back into my body and I want to live like I'm alive. I don't sleep; my nighttime is my only freedom. 
     I walk, against the September cold, in a slip, riding boots, and wool coat. I sit on the rooftop, soak in the stars hung in the dark sky, dreaming of a better tomorrow, one that doesn't consist of waking up at 5:30 am and driving to class. My body has reacted to the change in lifestyle; I no longer have energy, I am drained. 
     The mirror becomes my alibi, in fear of losing myself. The only thing that stays the same is the messiness of my hair, the look of dreaming. I look to the reflective glass and see that I am still me, I am still here. 
     We're gonna bust out of here, honey, I promise. We're gonna go to a place where color bursts through the seams and everything smells like happiness. This place we live in now will just be bad dreams, dreamt in black and white. We'll drive until we die and live along the way. We don't have #2 pencils but, baby, we've got our beauty. 
     Take your picture and tape it to the dashboard, because the only direction that we're gonna look is forward. You'll earn every wrinkle on your face, the story of your life itself. We're dreamers, waiting to be born again. 
     This, my darling, is a test. A test of character, a test of strength. A test of how far we can go in a prison cell before we wind up dead. Open the cathedral doors and bang on your drums, the worst is on it's way. 
But when we broke the rules, it wasn't for you. We did it for our freedom. 





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